THE REAL WAR ON CHRISTMAS

elfonashelfAs far as dumb internet things go, this one has to be my favorite.

Apparently, now there’s an “open letter” to parents who use the Elf-on-the-Shelf at Christmas time.

If you’re one of the self-righteous snarks who have been linking this to all your friends, I’m going to ask – politely – that you stop doing that.

BECAUSE EVERYBODY HAS DUMB TRADITIONS
Every family does dumb stuff at Christmas time. Your silly thing is no more noble than the other guy’s silly thing. Why do care so much about how another family celebrates Christmas? Why not just live your life? Why not just appreciate that there are lots of different types of families with lots of different holiday traditions?

BECAUSE THERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO BE AGAINST
Believe me – there are way more important Facebook issues to be worried about. Like your great-aunt who keeps posting articles from The Onion because she thinks they’re true. Or college girls who have worked so hard to document the 400+ pictures of them drinking beers at the lake. Let’s get our priorities straight.

BECAUSE YOU’RE BEING PROUD OF SOMETHING NOT GOOD
The over-arching theme of these anti-Elf posts seems to be something akin to: “stop doing all that Elf stuff / you’re making us look like bad parents. We’re now upset at other parents who are more organized or creative than us? When did we turn into Facebook jocks, making fun of all the nerds because we can’t do what they do? If “Elf” parents make you feel like a bad parent, maybe it’s not their fault.

BECAUSE THERE’S NO MORAL HIGH GROUND
In this debate, someone will eventually shake their head and drop this bomb: “well, I’m just not comfortable using some little plastic Elf to scare my kids into behaving.” That person either doesn’t have small children or is LYING. Because every single parent has tried to bargain with their kids. We’ve all used threats and made deals. Scare kids into behaving? That’s like Parenting 101.

Our family doesn’t do Elf-on-the-Shelf, but we have lots of other stuff that makes our house fun and gets us excited about being together at Christmas. This year, stop being weird and enjoy the people around you.

BOOKMARKS: SET 4

Screen shot 2013-11-06 at 4.44.37 PM-I watched the first episode of Arrow (way back when) but need to pick it up again. Hopefully before some of these DC Shows go on-air. (The Gordon script seems remarkably close to the Gotham Central comic book series which is surprisingly amazing.)

-Agree with Kevin Smith on this one: 30-second trailer for Batman: Arkham Origins does a better job of creating pathos than any full-length Batman film to date.

-Spent the last few weeks compiling some of my favorite Christmas albums into a playlist. Had totally forgotten about this one. What a voice.

I dare you to finish Alex Buono’s awesome – but oh so detailed – description of how SNL shot the recent Wes Anderson horror-movie parody. Most amazing thing? They decided to do this on Wednesday night, three days before air.

-My pal, Cory, linked this brief post on missing church.

Pomplamoose is back. IN A BIG BIG WAY. So creative, these two.

BOOKMARKS: SET 3

Arcade-FireMore and more ROCK STAR WORSHIP LEADERS are getting fired.

T-Bone Burnett theorizes about the internet revolution.

Don’t know if this is the best way for Christians to respond to the holiday issue. Can’t decide which I “like” more – the rap in the middle or the fact that they offer free downloads of the sheet music. (Almost 4 million views at this point, by the way.)

Yeah, probably never gonna’ parachute ever.

Arcade Fire tribute band. So great.

Percussionists: This is the Schlagwerk Sizzle Board. And it is cool.

Another percussion rated link – cajons tend to be very uncomfortable for players who use them for long stretches of time. Wondering if the Slap Top Cajon is a viable, easier-to play solution?